Sigrid Chapter 109

[ … words ]

Arkana grinned.

“Are there more people to interview?”

“Are you thinking of just hiring Alex and me? To form at least four teams, don’t we need to hire two or three more?”

“I suppose so.”

Sigrid let out a short sigh.

“If I could just leave everything to Arkana—”

“No way.”

Arkana answered coolly and firmly. Sigrid agreed with that statement as well. Her previous comment had been childish. It was absurd to hire people—especially those who would work with her for a long time—without even meeting them.

“Alright. Then please schedule the interviews quickly. I’d like to go down there after this week ends.”

“You’re in quite a hurry?”

“There’s not much more I can do in the capital. And working on-site is best.”

“True. How long do you plan to stay once you go down?”

“Well… I’ll probably need to stay for quite a while to stabilize things, won’t I?”

“Have you talked to Beramund about this?”

“Huh?”

“You’ll be apart for quite a long time, won’t you?”

At Arkana’s words, Sigrid’s mouth formed an “Ah—” shape. They had always been together, so she hadn’t even thought about being apart.

“You’re right. Come to think of it, I have my Vice-Captain duties too, so staying at the estate for a long time…”

Should she resign from her position?

But being a knight was one of Sigrid’s most important values.

‘No, quitting as Vice-Captain doesn’t mean I stop being a knight.’

Sigrid sighed.

“I think I need to sort some things out before I go. I’ll postpone it to the week after next.”

“Alright.”

Arkana nodded and then said:

“It’s your day off today, right? Why don’t you go see Beramund?”

“Should I?”

“Yes.”

Arkana nodded deeply. Sigrid replied “Okay” and looked down at her clothes. She had changed for the interview, so she was wearing quite a dignified outfit befitting a countess. Or rather, she should say she was wearing an extravagant coat.

“Is it alright to go like this?”

“It doesn’t matter.”

Arkana said lightly. Sigrid said as she loosened her cravat:

“This is too stuffy.”

“Then just wear a ribbon or something.”

“Good idea. Thanks, Arkana.”

Sigrid dashed upstairs and quickly returned with a ribbon instead.

“I’m off.”

“Take care.”

As Arkana was seeing her off, Seria asked with a puzzled expression:

“Is she going to meet her boyfriend dressed like that?”

“It’s decent, isn’t it?”

“Well, yes, but… The dress from before was pretty. The one she wore back from the ball.”

“It was too revealing.”

“Wow, you sound like an ethics teacher.”

“Seria.”

As Arkana turned to her with a stern expression, Seria giggled and retreated to her sanctuary, the kitchen, saying:

“You can’t stop fashion, old man.”

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Knock knock.

At the light knocking sound, Beramund looked up.

“Come in.”

As the door opened and an unexpected person entered, Beramund stood up.

“Siri? What brings you here? Didn’t you say you had some interviews today?”

“They’re over, so I came to see your face.”

Sigrid answered as she entered, closing the door and glancing at the documents on Beramund’s desk.

“It doesn’t seem like they’ve decreased at all.”

“Without you here, I don’t feel like working.”

“You shouldn’t be like that.”

Sigrid furrowed her brows. Beramund laughed, looking at her outfit.

“You look very countess-like.”

“Do I?”

Wearing an extravagant long coat, a vest underneath, and a ribbon on top of that.

Beramund marveled, thinking ‘How can such an outfit be this cute?’ and asked, lightly touching her ribbon:

“Did you interview candidates dressed like this?”

“No. I properly wore a cravat. I changed to this to come see you, Beramund. The cravat was too stuffy.”

“You did well.”

A cravat, that’s completely different.

Beramund nodded. Sigrid looked worriedly at the documents. A considerable amount had piled up. Sigrid unconsciously said:

“Beramund, what will you do if I resign?”

“…Resign?”

Beramund’s voice sharpened. Sigrid turned to look at him.

“It seems difficult to manage both the estate and my Vice-Captain duties. If I go down to the estate, I’ll probably need to stay for a long time. And I can’t leave the Vice-Captain position vacant for so long.”

Beramund stood askew.

“Couldn’t you at least discuss this with me?”

Sigrid tilted her head and said:

“I’m trying to discuss it now.”

“Is it a discussion to unilaterally say, ‘What will you do if I resign?’ Then? If I say no now, will you not resign?”

“That’s—”

“You’ve already made up your mind. So how is this a discussion?”

Beramund’s voice no longer had an edge. His tone was soft. But his eyes— they were similar to Beramund’s eyes when they met at the palace after the slum clearance operation.

There was no contempt or hatred, but—

‘He’s angry.’

She could tell he was very angry. Sigrid shook her head and said desperately:

“No. Actually, I hadn’t thought about it until today. Arkana pointed it out to me. That it would be difficult to manage both. That’s why I rushed over here.”

“To tell me you’re quitting?”

“No, to ask for your opinion.”

Sigrid emphasized again. At those words, Beramund half-sat on the desk and sighed.

“Siri, I love you.”

“I love you too…”

Sigrid replied as if protesting, making Beramund chuckle.

“So it hurts me to feel like I’m not that important to you. It’s also painful to realize that my words or intentions can’t influence you at all.”

“That’s not true.”

Sigrid shook her head. Beramund smiled faintly and said:

“Is that so? My opinion is probably no different from that of your close friends. No, maybe the opinions of Lady Inglet or Lowengrin are more important than mine.”

“That’s—”

Sigrid blinked. She had never thought Beramund would feel that way. Beramund lightly tapped his thigh.

“Am I wrong? Is this me underestimating myself too much? Or are you flustered because it’s true?”

Beramund unconsciously poured out the words he had been holding back. Sigrid values friendship and cherishes the people around her.

Yes, that’s what he likes about her.

But then, what’s different about him? How is he different from that Morris Deforest?

Is it just that they kiss?

“You’d die for me, but you’d do the same for others too.”

Beramund smiled bitterly, showing his palm.

“I’m just saying. So, you’re resigning?”

“It seems it will take a long time to stabilize the Conwills estate. But if you’re here, Beramund, we’ll grow apart. I…”

“Are you breaking up with me?”

At Beramund’s words, Sigrid flinched as if struck by lightning. Beramund shrugged.

“Can’t work, so resignation. Can’t see each other often, so breakup. Right?”

“No!”

Sigrid shouted.

“I don’t want to break up!”

After shouting, Sigrid hesitated and asked:

“…Do you want to break up?”

“No.”

Beramund shook his head. He felt relieved at Sigrid’s outcry.

Why does he keep seeking confirmation?

Beramund himself wasn’t unaware of the reason.

‘I’m insecure.’

How many times had he been caught off guard by Sigrid? Although they were miraculously dating now, he worried that at any moment she might say, “I’m sorry. I thought about it, and it was just friendship.”

Really, how differently does she treat him compared to others? To Sigrid, isn’t a lover just a friend you kiss?

Such pathetic worries and insecurities.

Beramund said in a low voice:

“I don’t want to break up either.”

Sigrid felt relieved at that answer. Come to think of it, she had meant to discuss things with Beramund all along but hadn’t managed to. She had spoken comfortably to Arkana and her friends who were close by, but…

“I’m not good at talking, but.”

Sigrid glanced at the clock and said:

“Let’s talk today. I’ll wait until you’re finished.”

“It’ll take a while.”

“I understand.”

Sigrid bowed slightly and left the room. As she closed the door, Beramund stared at it for a moment before roughly messing up his hair with both hands.

“Ah, really. Beramund Lunatil—”

A relaxed romance.

That’s what he prided himself on. He thought he could maintain this stance even with Sigrid. But what was that outburst just now? It was truly pathetic.

It’s easy to see that Sigrid has suddenly been entrusted with a large estate and that it’s overwhelming for her. And here’s her boyfriend acting like this…

‘How pitiful.’

He should have been more relaxed, observing and helping from the side…

But it angered him that she didn’t do that with him first. It seemed like she was closer to Arkana, closer to her other friends.

He knew Sigrid liked him, but she wouldn’t marry—

As Marie-Chez said, he might just be the first, easy-to-date boyfriend. Someone she would eventually break up with.

Thinking about that made him feel so anxious he couldn’t stand it.

Beramund glanced at his desk.

There were certainly a lot of documents, and Sigrid didn’t have much time.

Would she really wait until he finished work?

‘No, she’d wait all day if necessary.’

And she wouldn’t even get angry for being made to wait.

She’d just ask, “Are you finished?” and suggest they go talk. Beramund rubbed his face.

‘But I can’t be that petty.’

Beramund lightly picked up the jacket hanging on the hook. As Beramund left the room, Sigrid, who had been sitting in the waiting chair next to the door, turned her head.

“Let’s go.”

“Already?”

“I can deal with work tomorrow.”

“Beramund.”

“You’re more important.”

At those words, Sigrid opened her mouth, then closed it. She stood up, and Beramund asked:

“Did you come on horseback?”

“Yes.”

“Alright. Then let’s go to my place.”

“Okay.”

Sigrid nodded. Beramund hesitated, then held out his hand. Sigrid took it and smiled brightly.

Looking at her face, Beramund thought:

No matter what hand she played, he would surely lose to her.

Sigrid was quiet the entire way.

Beramund watched her closely. Lost in thought, she kept her gaze fixed between her horse’s ears, her lips tightly pressed together.

Though anxiety crept over him, Beramund also remained silent as they rode side by side.

Upon arriving at Beramund’s house, Sigrid took off her coat. Even the thinnest coat was too hot to wear in this weather. Still, etiquette demanded that she couldn’t go without an outer garment.

‘Maybe I should have worn the tunic Lowengrin bought me before.’

“Sit down. Iced tea?”

“Yes.”

Sigrid nodded. Beramund ordered two glasses of tea from the butler and sat down, crossing one leg over the other.

“So—?”

At Beramund’s words, Sigrid looked at her knees, then across at Beramund.

“I thought about what you said earlier.”

“What did I say?”

“That I would die for you, but I would do the same for others too.”

“Ah.”

Beramund adjusted his posture.

Was this the moment to say, It was just a passing comment, don’t worry about it?

But that wasn’t just a passing comment. It was something he had been constantly thinking about.

Just then, the maid returned with the iced tea. Glass cups filled with ice and cold tea. Sigrid accepted it with a faint smile. Arkana grinned.